What’s so bad about Russia invading Ukraine? So, big bad Vlad is after “Putin” his lads into Ukraine. So what? Ethnically speaking, the area that’s been invaded – where his alleged “Crimeas” have occurred – is Russian. The people speak Russian, dress Russian and are always late and therefore forever Russian. Yeah I know, an invasion is a bit far but it’s not like the USA or the UK never invaded anywhere or interfered to serve their own interests; at least here it’s partly justifiable because the people they’re “invading” are Russian instead of just having lots of oil. I’d say Tony Blair is still digging for WMDs somewhere out by Fallujah. Here we also see the media tell us that Russia is bullying Ukraine and that the Russians are bogeymen. This is inaccurate. Anyone remember the time Fox News faked an Iraqi Scud missile strike in Jerusalem on a green screen? True story. The media portray what they’re told to and not solely the Western view. Two anchors from Russia Today news channel have resigned already in protest, making them Russia Yesterday’s News. We have no real objective view in the media, just two polar opposite propaganda machines fighting each other with fearmongering and old video clips of Red Army exercises. The truth isn’t in the mainstream media; the truth is that part of Ukraine is Russian and that Crimeans should be allowed a democratic vote to assert their identity. Crimea is semi-autonomous anyway so they’re entitled to decide their own future. It is a fallacy to believe the idea of Crimeans cowering in their homes in fear of the Russians as portrayed by the Western media. It is also a fallacy to believe the Russian tales of liberation and freedom from the tyranny...

So, let me ask the question: what exactly is so bad about the recession? It’s a serious question. At the time of writing we have the Cypriots protesting, much to Turkey’s amusement, one might suspect. We have Greeks throwing bricks, furniture and anything else they can get their impoverished hands on. Here in old Eire we remain disgruntled yet docile and even show signs of having forgiven Fianna Fáil (my spell checker tells me the fada is not necessary.) But let’s consider the benefits of this catastrophe we have been thrown into by Seánie Fitzpatrick, Michael “Fingers” Fingleton et al. Firstly, day to day costs have come down in price (mostly.) Now, it is a pity chocolate is going up but, otherwise, we now have more competition between the German shops and our own over-priced ones. As the adverts tell you, vegetables can be bought for as little as twenty or thirty cents – ditto for clothes. Some prices may still be high but now the wool you could sheer off the old sheep yourself and knit for half nothing costs a lot less in the high street shops. However, we have learnt a bit of cop on (temporarily, at the very least.) Secondly, houses aren’t springing up like mushrooms. These days there are stricter regulations on one-offs and sprawling drug estates are not as numerous, though the ones currently around can be sorted easily, so quit complaining. During the Celtic Tiger money was as plentiful as jobs. Hence, on this understanding, ugly, often unpainted houses were built, notably in more rural areas. These were buildings which rivalled their 70s counterparts for the (un)coveted prize of ugliest architecture. If these houses were left unpainted they were nearly always suffocated in brickwork on the façade....

  by Conor Scannell Out of all the shocking things taking place on the planet today ( i.e North Korea’s recent nuclear test) the horse meat scandal is by far the least important. Allow me to tell you a story. When I was a young bright-eyed child, and not the jaded wreck that I am today, I was fond of an Australian brand of chocolate bar called “Three Wished”. They were taken off the European and North American markets in 2002 because it was found that they contained human skin. I, upon hearing the news, was never so distraught in my entire life. I firmly believe that what you don’t know can’t hurt you and the ulcer in my stomach lining will prove that I am right. I’ll bet that everyone who ate the horse burgers was rather pleased with them and wasn’t able to tell the difference between horse and beef. The main reason that people are so upset about this is because horses are considered to be beautiful and elegant creatures who beautifully and elegantly portray some beautiful and elegant human characteristics in their beauty and elegance … among other lies, while cows are ugly, smelly disgusting, vile animals and the only productive thing they’ll do in their lives is get killed and be eaten. It’s a simple business arrangement – I’m hungry and he’s made of beef. When you sit down to eat your dinner would you rather have a fat repulsive animal festering on your plate or a beautiful and elegant animal lying on the plate beautifully and elegantly? The Aintree racecourse in the U.K. has a contract with a licensed slaughterhouse in Yorkshire to deal with the remains of dead Grand National racehorses. This could prove to be a...